As far as the exercise goes, how old is he? My son is 11. He did not really learn to ride a bike until he was 7 or 8. He tried soccer and hated it! He also isn't the most coordinated kid on the planet. He just started tae kwon do and seems to like that but completely avoids team and group sports.
Let him choose his own path when it comes to exercise and fitness. If he likes to be outside playing on the swings or running around, that counts.
It's fun, it provides exercise and it costs nothing. I think our society is really a bit twisted when it comes to team sports. We start children younger and younger in these activities, we as a society want them to become "team players”, group participants and yes, "mentally tough". Think about that! It really doesn't make sense. I've never heard "mental toughness" being needed to overcome sensory integration issues. In the coach saying he needs mental toughness, he is nearly implying that he is just a "wimp" and needs to toughen up to overcome his challenges. Personally there is nothing I hate more than that type of faulty equation. Children should do things not to learn what I feel are "corporate" personality skills, but to find joy and pleasure in the physical activity itself.
I have been involved in various sports my entire life. Mental toughness? No, I don't think so. I look at sports for what they can do for us over the course of our lives.
There are a lot of mental or psychological benefits but for me, they are related to feelings of personal enjoyment and achievement. Perhaps He would enjoy more individually oriented sports, like swimming for instance. You can also consider hiking, running, climbing, or whatever he is interested in. He has lots of time to develop an interest. I wouldn't lose sleep over it. Offer choices and let him decide.
May I also suggest a book? Sportswise by Lyle Micheli MD.
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